Monique Faison Ross

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Welcome

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The Blessing and Curse of Personality Type 8

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Twice I have taken the Enneagram Personality Inventory. Both times the result is the same – Type 8. I can finally understand what makes me tick in a psychological way. Why traits that plague me don’t bother others and vice versa. Leah and I have used the results of our Enneagram over the last year to recognize our blind spots, to strengthen us as individuals and as a couple. Once “typed” the Enneagram can be a vital link between the psyche and the spirit of people. The nine different types…read more

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The Best Rejection

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Aspiring writers can easily find an endless amount of nasty or rude rejections wielded by literary agents. But not this time. “Subject: Query Dear Monique, Thank you for sharing your work with me–and for your patience in waiting to hear back. You write well, but I’m afraid that I just didn’t have that “Yes! This is for me!” feeling–so I’m going to bow out. That said, I’d be happy to hear about any future manuscripts you may have. Please see further information below. Whatever happens, I hope you will continue…read more

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Losing Dad

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William Earl Faison (January 31, 1939 – June 12, 2016). Most people know him as the former professional football player, a member, in the 60’s, of the Fearsome Foursome with the San Diego Chargers, an occasional actor or as the teacher and assistant principal who inspired countless students. He was dad to me and grandpa to my four children. At six feet five inches, 270 pounds, he was a man that almost always had to duck his head when entering most homes. His gait slow and deliberate. When looking at pictures…read more

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Shame vs Guilt

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I am currently reading The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown and have only begun to explore the depth to which she writes. I don’t think I have ever finished a self-help book except hers. She studies and then writes about the things that get in the way of living fulfilling lives. There is transparency in her words. I like that. While reading I had a light-bulb moment – I despise my story. The emotions that I struggle to cope with have everything to do with shame and guilt. “Shame…read more

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Switching Teams

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“I could never do what you’ve done.” I realize, while listening to my friend, she was not referring to my surviving a targeted attempt on my life, she meant, my ‘switching teams.’ People often assume my wife, Leah, is the first woman I ever dated but that is not the case. Actually, my first relationship with a woman lasted 22 incredible yet tumultuous months prior to my dating and marrying my wife. That first relationship was completely responsible for where I am today. I doubt my ex would appreciate knowing…read more

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Next One up to the Bimah

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It was a beautiful fall day when our fourth child was called to the Torah as a bat mitzvah. The trees were showy with brilliant orange and auburn colors. The bimah in a synagogue is the raised area of the sanctuary where everything happens. When you enter our synagogue sanctuary, you are greeted with warm earthy tones on the floor that perfectly complement the oak pews and walls. On each side of the bimah, floor to ceiling, there are blocks of stained glass windows that remain illuminated when the room…read more

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Relocation After Trauma

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After the survival of our family’s traumatic events months before, I moved myself and the kids to the northeast from Florida in August 1998. It began with a call from an old friend, Rabbi Adler, who had relocated his family to West Hartford, Connecticut a couple of years earlier. I had stayed in contact with Rabbi and Leslie Adler after they moved. “We heard what happened to you. Why not move to West Hartford? There is a Solomon Schechter Day School here for the kids, many synagogues and lots of…read more

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Dream Interpretation

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When I wake and am unsettled by an odd or scary dream, I look it up right away. The dream resource that years ago was a book on my nightstand has since been replaced with a search on www.dreammoods.com. I look up each dream snippet (i.e. the house with no windows, a toothless dialogue companion, a tornado). Details are important. Sometimes, I will copy and paste each researched paragraph from the website into one document so that I am able to absorb the information at one time. The individual parts…read more

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Almost 50 and Proud of It

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I seem to be the only person I know, that is thrilled and excited to be turning 50. My wife Leah asked me if I wanted a party with friends or if I would prefer to spend my big birthday on a family trip? “There is nothing that can compare to a family trip. I want to be with just my wife and my children,” was my immediate response. I don’t understand why friends and co-workers hate the thought of getting older. I guess as much as I can’t identify…read more

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College Decisions and Financial Aid

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It’s that time of year when college acceptances are appearing in mailboxes, accompanied by what many hope will be a generous financial aid package. I have experienced and survived this process three times so far, with one more to go. The most important relationship I worked to establish when sending a child off to college was an advocate in the financial aid office. I can even tell you the names of each financial aid “friend” I made as my children ventured into the world of higher education. What parents often…read more

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